Just Read

I've received emails and a comment regarding neurosis.

You and me, we have a history. Some of our histories are full of joy, laughter, warmth, and presence. Other's histories are detailed with abuse, neglect, addiction, anxiety, depression, etc. I like the first over the latter. At this point we can't choose our past. It's done, except for those memory neurons that keep firing and continue keeping our memories alive. These memories determine alot. This is an understatement. I think our childhood meant something. We may be adults now, but our childhood continues. We assessed our meaning in the early days by the faces of those around us and the touches they offered. The quality of those early days have residue into our adulthood. Those were the days of meaning. Where we discovered that we were important and cherrished to those close to us. For some, those days never arrived. This is where neurosis begins. Unhealthy emotional families keep their children off balance. The children try to reclaim balance by becoming what the family system demands of them. These children develop a life command: "Be what others want you to be and then you can have peace." This is a redicullous way to live. These children as adults have little to no sense of self. I know because it is me. Decades of attempting to be everything to everybody else, thus a "False" self, an actor in a sick distorted play. Every waking hour being on stage and performing for others, so they will be happy, so I can be happy. This is an expression of neurosis. Neurosis is to light of a word. It is emotional and spiritual cancer of the worst kind. If it is not treated it will destroy. This is not a warning, but reality. I've lived it. It is not something that happens to a person, but is a choice, an idolotrous choice, "Others above God". Living, breathing, rumminating, over the opportunity to prove one's importance to others. A treadmill of death, that's what it is! I'm off, no more! What we need is circumcission. A slicing and bleeding of our memories. A removal that heals and gives us a new identity... a "True" self. This is Christianity. A complete reworking of our inner-life as we experience the healthy family system of the Trinity. Acceptance, value, redemption, forgiveness, esteem, identity, peace, presence are the commodity of this Family. I like this family. It lets my old family off the hook, forgiveness is theirs and mine. I am a child once again. I am being restored. I am my Abba's child and so are you.